Grief

10/4/1938 – 4/7/2015

I mentioned before that my Mamaw recently passed away. Those are her numbers. And yesterday I talked about anxiety and thought it would be fitting for me to talk about grief today.

I didn’t cry at the funeral. I almost did, but chose not to. Sometime we can do that, but other times the tears flow. Crying is a natural thing and does help us feel better, but I believe there are times where we can cry and cry and it just makes us feel worse and worse. If you are wondering, I have cried about my Mamaw in private. That is where I like to do my crying.

It seems there are cultures and have been cultures where there is a designated grieving period. In the Bible you can read about people who lament. But I don’t think there is one right way to grieve. Especially when someone you care about dies, grief is going to be an ongoing thing. You learn to deal with the pain.

I lost my dad almost 15 years ago. That was when my life turned upside down. Shortly after he died my mom and I moved leaving my grown sister behind and I started two new schools. As long ago as that was, I still think about him all the time and even cry because I miss him and can’t see him. I have learned to live my life without him, but there is still times of grief.

Anxiety likes to hang around grief. Grieving for lost family members can make you anxious about the future. My family is spread out so I always have this underlying anxiety about missing time with them. When they are gone, there is no going back to make up for lost time.

Unfortunately, not all circumstances can be changed in an instant where everyone can be closer to family. There are other people’s family members around us. The other people we are around are being missed by their family. We become friends with these people and they become close to us like family. We can love on these people. Of course, efforts should be made to stay in touch and even be closer to family. But all we have is right now. Who around you can you love?

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